The Redheaded Law of Attraction

No. You’re not going to find anything in your textbooks about the Redheaded Law of Attraction. But it’s a real thing.

In case I didn’t mention this in an earlier post, I am a redhead (and proud!). Yes, I am a 6-foot tall ginger and I can’t hide anywhere I go.

There are a lot of things people don’t know about redheads, as a dying race, we hold a lot of secrets the rest of the world may never know (imagine dramatically intense music here). Something completely rare happened last weekend, three redheads met, an entirely random convergence, outside a bar. My brother and I were arguing about where to eat (my brother isn’t full ginge like his lucky sister but he rocks a fantastically red beard) when another redhead (who remarkably resembled grounds keeper Willy) approached us and started talking to us about the bleak future of our kind- we’re less than one percent of the global population. Yes, redheads make up one of the most unrecognized minorities in the world. It’s a hard knock life. With such small numbers, there’s a lot you don’t know about our (sexy) selves, but here’s the highlights; we are sensitive to spicy foods and sunlight. Yes we all know redheads burn easily but I’m talking about our eyes, our eyes are sensitive to the sunlight. Here’s one of our coolest superpowers; we have a higher pain tolerance, which was confirmed by my doctor. Cool.

But the most interesting, mysterious fact about redheads is we attract each other. I’m giving away secrets here that I could get in trouble for. If there are two redheads in a room we will undoubtedly end up next to each other purely by coincidence. On elevators, escalators and lines we will absolutely find ourselves standing next to the only other redhead in view. I cannot count how many times this has happened to me and that’s why I’m bringing it up now, it just happened, again!

I was sitting in the university center minding my own business getting ready to write a completely different blog entry when a redhead sat down right next to me. This time, it’s gotten a little weird. She looks like me. I know “all redheads look alike, you guys are brother and sister, right?” Her face looks like me, we are both quietly reading and sipping coffee. Weird. The Law of Attraction got me again.

If I die before I can scientifically prove the Redheaded Law of Attraction, I will be haunted by that disappointment. This is my money maker here, all I need is some scientific proof.  Ask any redhead and I guarantee they will confirm it. I myself would lay down money on the theory, which is saying a lot because I’m a broke college student.

Keep your eyes open and you might just see for yourselves one of our mysteries. Why we are the dying race doesn’t make any sense to me- we are the ones with superpowers after all.